Stop issuing ultimatums, leave alone the past, and finally forget about the former. Here is more.
1. It's all your fault!
A flood of accusations will not benefit your partner even if the loved one is really to blame for the situation. Be smarter and don't add fuel to the fire. It is better later when the passions have subsided, calmly talk and find out who is to blame and what to do.
2. But he(she) always did it for me
Never, remember, never mention an ex in a conversation. Neither good nor evil - nothing at all.
A partner may have a reasonable question; is that relationship over if you constantly remember them? Endless comparisons with someone's "ideal" (in fact, not) will drive a loved one into complexes and neuroses. And this is love for you?
If you wish to change your partner's actions, try more civilized methods, such as heart-to-heart talk or gentle persuasion.
Read also: 5 Signs Of An Unhealthy Relationship
3. I have never heard more stupidity in my life
If you entered into a relationship consciously, then you probably imagine the intellectual level of your partner. Therefore, you should not contemptuously or mockingly speak about his ridiculous - exclusively, in your opinion - ideas and thoughts. The only outcome of this is that the beloved person closes in, withdraws into himself, and completely stops sharing anything with you.
You can tactfully and delicately point out to your partner that the thought is illogical, and in response to a joke that you heard in elementary school, you need to smile. In the end, the person did his best to please you.
4. Can't do anything normally
Such things cannot be said aloud at all. And try not to think so to yourself. Give thanks for trying, praise for your efforts. And if something didn't work out, it doesn't matter; together, you will find a way out of the situation and a solution to the problem.
What is dearer to you: peace in the family or a perfectly screwed shelf in the kitchen?
And if you knew in advance that your partner would not cope with the case, why did you entrust him? Failure is humiliating to both of you.
5. And I said (a)
This generally transcends good and evil.
Don't turn into an evil monster and forget about the existence of this phrase forever. Is it so important for you to show that you are right and be the one to have the last word? It won't give you anything good, believe me.
Mistakes are a part of human nature, and only those who do nothing are not mistaken.
Let your partner make mistakes and learn the right lessons from them. Your task is to support and love, not to expose and triumph. Smile and tell your loved one that next time he will definitely succeed.
6. If you loved me, you would never ...
To issue ultimatums and conditions is humiliating and dishonest. Do not manipulate your loved one and not put him before a choice; you or something else. Constant pressure on your partner will lead to an explosion. The man will kick up and send you to hell.
Try to find compromises and take into account the wants and needs of the other half. Don't you like it when people respect your needs?
7. Don't wear it
Reconciling with someone else's wardrobe can be difficult.
However, you have to do it or find ways to influence to maintain the relationship gently. For example, a worn-out husband's T-shirt can suddenly disappear from the closet, and a stylish new thing will take its place. It's even easier with women; just go shopping with your beloved and give the go-ahead (and money) to buy only what you like.
In any case, always explain your position and strive for a compromise. Don't like skirts that are too short? Have the wife wear them at home or one day of the week.
8. But my mom did it differently
This is an option for men. Do not try to blurt out this, especially if the beloved is not in the best mood. Otherwise, you run the risk of hearing advice to pack your things and immediately go live with your mother. This is a dead-end option for the development of relations.
A wife or girlfriend will never be like your mom.
This is not necessary. It is better to unobtrusively teach your wife about "mom's" recipes or show you how you used to iron shirts. That is, the way their mother once stroked them.
Also read: 3 Ways To Get Rid Of a Tiring Relationship
9. In bed, you are a complete zero
If yesterday's passionate lover runs out of steam, do not rush to throw angry accusations in your face and demand African passion here and now. Situations are different, and a person could be trite at work. It's not bad to take a critical look at yourself from the outside. It might be worth tightening your figure, shedding your beer belly, or buying sexy underwear.
If you initially knew about the low sexual temperament of your soul mates, do not say that you entered into a relationship with hope and thoughts, “appetite comes with eating.” You can try - delicately and unobtrusively - to stir up your loved one and show him new facets of sex. But to force, coerce and insult is the path to rupture.
10. There are only losers in your family
Family is sacred. Even if your partner does not get tired of throwing mud at your relatives, you are strictly prohibited from doing this. You are now a member of a family with a difficult relationship, so it is much wiser and safer to remain neutral. And in any case, do not let yourself be drawn into undercover games. For you, they will come out sideways since relatives will support each other in any case. Nothing makes former enemies more united than a new common enemy.
Adapted and translated by The Cop Cart Staff
Sources: Life hacker