Taking the right priorities and taking care of yourself will help you overcome a difficult life period.
I’m exhausted. In six weeks, I will have a baby, and my pregnancy is going through complications. At the same time, I continue to work and participate in new projects.
It’s hard: for every small victory in this difficult period, there was a moment when I felt destroyed. Recently, I realized what helps me overcome fatigue. If it’s not easy for you too, my advice may come in handy.
Don’t compare your tiredness with someone else’s
Over a year ago, a friend of mine was diagnosed with breast cancer. She quit her job despite the risk of running out of money. She broke off a relationship that was not suitable for her, despite the engagement. And she met cancer with her usual courage. Her fear was not that she was not afraid, but she overcame a difficult period, despite her fears.
My conditions are much nicer, and sometimes it seems that I really have no reason to be so worried. My experience is nothing compared to what my friend went through. I think I should just come to terms with my stress at the end of a hard day, silently go through any fatigue or discomfort just because I’m lucky.
Read also: How to Live When You Don’t Want Anything.
But it’s hard for me too. I am still going through a difficult pregnancy, trying to do everything in time, facing unpleasant physical symptoms and many fears. There will always be someone who had a harder time, but why blame yourself for this?
People find themselves in different situations and may equally need help and understanding.
Stop focusing on what is not important.
In tough times, we need to understand better what really matters and what doesn’t. If we spend all our energy on unimportant things, we will not have enough energy to do what really changes our lives.
Seven years ago, I had an operation to remove myoma of the uterus. I knew that I shouldn’t strain myself for a speedy recovery, but the mess in the room haunted me. I’m a fan of the order.
A day has passed since the operation. The seam after the incision in the lower abdomen has just begun to tighten. And then I see a pair of shoes casually thrown by the door. And I knew that they should not lie there. It hurt, but I tried to put these shoes in the closet. Mom said I was crazy, and she was right.
Now I think back to the shoe incident every time I feel exhausted and want to do something. I ask myself: will it wait until morning? Or maybe I shouldn’t be doing this at all? What if someone helps me? And most importantly, will it really make my life better?
Crossing things off your planner is not easy, especially if you, like me, are used to taking everything on yourself. But sometimes, we need to give up something to maintain strength and protect ourselves from a nervous breakdown.
Do not think that in a breakdown, you are capable of what you could have done before.
Maybe you were more active or productive before (I definitely was). Or were you the kind of person you could ask for help at any time of the day? Or a great conversationalist who could listen to a friend, even if it took the whole night.
We worry that we will no longer be the same and because others will not like these changes. But we inevitably face new challenges and needs that will not go away if we ignore them.
I don’t romanticize change. Not being able to do what you used to enjoy sucks.
I don’t go to yoga anymore because I don’t have the time and energy. And I still don’t do a bunch of things that used to be my every day. But I’m lucky: someday I will be able to do it again, even if not soon.
It’s okay to worry about what you can’t do. But in the end, we still have to accept reality and ask ourselves how to work with what we have. Otherwise, we will be anxious, and these experiences will not change anything.
Don’t ask yourself what you can’t do.
Many of us make this mistake. We think we can do more: others do! If you feel bad, don’t convince yourself that everything is okay. This will not make you more productive. And reproaching yourself for the forced respite is also pointless.
If you are tired, you need rest. And if it hurts – compassion. And nothing will change for the better until you get what you need.
We cannot give up everything and do what we want, especially if we have responsibility for others. But we can definitely find a little time to please ourselves.
Recently, I started introducing such resting moments into my schedule. If I cannot afford an hour of naps, I will get 15 minutes of sleep. If I do not have time to walk 10,000 steps, I will walk around the block. If I don’t have an hour to write in my diary about all my experiences, I will take the time to note three important problems and three ways to solve them.
Stop thinking that you are falling behind.
We constantly compare ourselves with others and think that we must keep up with them. Otherwise, we will waste our lives. It is not true.
You don’t have to be perfect to be happy. We do not need to be afraid to lag behind someone because each of us follows our own path. And whatever is happening in our lives now, this is a valuable experience.
Also read: How to De-Stress from Work.
Many will agree that success is inextricably linked to overcoming challenges. I would never have thought that my ten-year struggle with depression and bulimia would bring about a change for the better. I could not imagine how my pain will determine my life’s further trajectory and how this dark stage will lead me to new ones – bright, filled, and exciting.
Accept where you are and who you are now, even if all this does not suit you. Only in this way can you achieve high goals in the future.
Adapted and translated by The Cop Cart Staff
Sources: Life hacker